Want your marriage to last the harsh winter like a squirrel’s acorn supply? It’s quite simple: you need two comforters.
Of all the challenges in sharing a bed with my husband—our very different sleep schedules, his night terrors, my teeth grinding—the greatest is that he is a notorious covers thief.
Last night I made the bed with Collin already in it; perfectly even, well tucked-in. I slipped in alongside him and began reading him a bedtime story (the first two chapters of Mindy Kaling’s book, which is wonderful so far). We hadn’t even finished the preface before I felt a chill, looked down, and saw the covers had shifted dramatically to Collin’s side of the bed, leaving half my body with only a top sheet between me and our icy bedroom air. Even when he’s AWAKE he steals the covers.
The only solution is to have a second comforter waiting for me at the foot of the bed to replace the one that Collin will inevitably yank away to create his little bed burrito. It’s not a perfect fix—I’d much rather share trapped body heat, and the bulk of two comforters can create an awkward barrier that makes spooning much less satisfying. But it keeps me from waking up ten times every night to try to reclaim stolen blanket coverage so I can stop feeling like I’m sleeping in someone’s backyard in Saskatchewan, and thereby, saves my marriage.
Do you sleep with a covers thief? Do you have a better solution [Spritzing the thief with water like a misbehaving kitty? Stapling the blanket to either side of the bed? Turning up the thermostat to create a reasonable indoor temperature? (Hahahahaha! Just kidding about that last one.)] than our one-comforter-per-person strategy?