I just filed my state taxes FROM AN AIRPORT GATE at the last-ish minute1 because I am a ridiculous excuse for a grown-up American citizen.
As I flipped through the paperwork on my lap and punched my social security number in my cell phone for the fifth time, Collin said, “At least this is the last year you have to do this alone.”
Amen. Dudes, I think “making Collin do our taxes” is one of the things that I most look forward to about marriage. I know that is sexist! I know it is exploiting my straight privilege! And I’m sorry for that! But dude, Collin is organized, responsible, and geeks out about finances. I found one of my 1099′s in a pile of bridal magazines. I wish that were a joke. We’ll have the privilege of joint filing and I will be exploiting the privilege of Collin doing the joint filing. I’ll try to make up for that failure as a human being/feminist with some other mitzvah.
I could probably hire an accountant every year for the next few centuries for the cost of our wedding, but I’m not saying that I’m marrying Collin so he’ll do my taxes. I’m just acknowledging how much I like that perk.
1Taxes are actually due April 18th this year, for reasons I am too lazy to Google.
April 15, 2011 at 5:13 pm
I feel bad occasionally when our natural strengths line up with stereotypical gender roles, and then I remind myself of all of the ways that they don’t.
Huzzah for fiances who pick up our slack!
April 15, 2011 at 10:01 pm
Collin does more cleaning than me, I’d say we cook an equal amount… I’m not sure where I’m picking up dude-gendered things to make up for the “chick stuff” Collin does.
Collin, reading over my shoulder, “I know! You throw your shit on the floor and make me pick it up for you.” How charming.
April 15, 2011 at 5:31 pm
My husband has done my taxes every year (except 1) for the last 8. Last year was the first year I filed as a married lady (we dated for a little while before getting married . The one year I had to do my own taxes was awful.
There’s nothing wrong with your nature aligning with gender roles, it’s the vice versa that’s the issue….
April 15, 2011 at 10:03 pm
I’m not sure why I feel like Collin doing my taxes for me is off the table when I’m delighted he’ll be doing OUR taxes. Sounds like I missed out on three tax years of passing the buck.
April 15, 2011 at 6:20 pm
Dude, we aren’t even married yet and I let Mr. Beagle do the taxes. I do however sit with him and watch, because I feel like that is the very least I could do.
But I love not having to do it with my mother, the overly critical accountant. Every year she did them, she’d obviously find out how much I made and then drill me about how much money I had saved up.
April 15, 2011 at 10:04 pm
I am guessing Collin will do that stuff. But I guess it is ok, because of the whole mutual financial responsibility thing.
April 15, 2011 at 7:19 pm
Today is a holiday in DC, Emancipation Day, commemorating the day that all the slaves in DC were freed in 1860-something. Because our local government stuff was closed they pushed off the tax due date for the entire country to Monday.
The irony, of course, being that DC is taxed without representation in congress, and we were recently thrown under the bus and denied even more of our rights in the recent budget kerfuffle, but I won’t hijack your comments with all that.
We fall along gender stereotypes in a LOT of ways, naturally, and it makes me feel guilty. I cook, he pays the bills, I decorate the house, he takes out the trash. But I know that we’ve really examined the reasons why this is, and it’s because of our talents and strengths, not because of social mores. So it’s all good. And he’s an accountant, so I bet he’ll be doing the taxes too.
April 15, 2011 at 10:09 pm
Thanks for the answer! That’s a good reason to delay the tax deadline.
Also, I want to say if one member of a marriage is an accountant, that person does the taxes, obvy, duh. But some people might think that I should have to do the taxes because I’m a lawyer. And those people are jerks.
April 21, 2011 at 10:30 pm
Speaking as a guy who plugged through five separate tax returns with his girlfriend, I am siding with the jerks on this one.
The tendency for traditionally female roles to get distributed evenly and traditionally male roles to remain with the males can be very frustrating. But then the guy can’t admit that, because it’d be unmanly. So, it’s a good thing to keep an eye on to avoid sublimated conflict.
April 16, 2011 at 12:23 am
So many engaged ladies and newlyweds are talking about this, which makes me happy as an accounting grad student. Needless to say, Stephen is really happy about having me to do our taxes next year. I think its just as bad to make decisions solely to avoid gender stereotypes as it is to rigidly adhere to them, so try not to worry about that too much!
April 16, 2011 at 12:40 am
I do our taxes and have done since we moved to Australia together. For some reason I really like filling out forms. I am strange. I also deal with our financial stuff- making sure we are saving enough and paying the bills on time.
But on the other hand, I do most of the cooking, would never consider taking out the bins or washing the car, and I can’t haggle to save my life.
April 16, 2011 at 10:18 pm
Friday was a holiday in DC. And I’m now paying my own health insurance, which means I’m 3 months late. But I swear, I’ll mail it on Monday. Worthless excuse for a grownup, I am.
April 18, 2011 at 4:41 pm
I renewed my car registration the day it was due from my phone in a parking lot outside the DMV (line was tooo long), and felt both irresponsible and bad-ass.
Taxes are another story. I’ve been doing both of ours for the past 3 years, because I am a freak and like doing taxes. And I don’t even want to think about Scott hemming and hawing on 4/15 being “confused” until I stepped in to help. I’d rather him hand me his folder of forms so I can get them done myself in March.
April 19, 2011 at 9:35 am
Friday was ‘Emancipation Day”, a holiday celebrating the emancipation of slaves in D.C.
I am a tax accountant and still hate doing my personal taxes. Blah.
Found your site through Broke Ass Bride – and while I am not getting married, I have 7 friends getting married in the next two years and I am in 5 of the weddings, maid of honor in 2. I am slowly exploring the world of wedding blogs.
April 20, 2011 at 8:15 pm
such a huge perk to being married! lord, I hate doing taxes. my husband did mine while we were dating too but now I am benefiting from being with him too ha ha